I bet you thought you were pretty smart huh? Got excited whenever someone used the word "acquiesc" because you think you know what it means? Well guess what, you are an idiot compared to this kid.
A British schoolboy has been hailed as the new Mozart - even though he has only been having piano lessons for four months.
Shane's father Clayton, 48, said: "Aged seven, he got his first keyboard and within a day he could play it with both hands.
"Within weeks he played all sorts of complex music. And after four months he was performing to 2,000 people at a show in Manchester."
This kid will make billions of dollars. You probably won't. Why? Because you can't play the piano very well. I took four years of piano and got so good that Jesus F. Christ came down and offered me the exclusive intellectual property to all past and future piano music. I accepted his offer and 30 HeavenDollars™ later I have become the proud owner of all tuned percussive note-combinations. So you see, every time this kid or anyone else presses down one key on any piano on 34 out of the 172 known planets, I get $0.40.
But I ultra-digress™. My point is that one sure-fire way to make millions is to be a prodigy. Or at least, pretend you are. Warning: If you are under 18, don't do anything that will make you lots of money because your parents will just take it all and buy a lot of coke with it. Not the delicious kind of coke either. The "sugar-free" stuff that makes you feel happier than is legally allowed.
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